farraas afiefah muhdiar: A Bothering Brother

Let me tell you something about someone whom I once considered as my biggest enemy, yet I know I couldn't live without. Someone whom I have known for exactly 20 years today.

Meet my smirky little brother.

Just like any other siblings in the world, we used to fight a lot. He used to punch and kick me, and I used to grab his hair and told him that he was adopted, as he is the only one in the family who has O blood type (worked like a charm, every single time). We fought every day and drove our parents crazy. We are only 18 months apart and it was only the two of us until 5 years later, so we became each other's biggest rival.

During the fight, especially in my preadolescence years when he became my biggest bully, I used to cry and wonder, why did Allah give me such an annoying little brother. Why do we hate each other so much? Why didn't He give me an older brother who can protect me instead? Yes, you know how dramatic a preteen girl could be - especially the one who read a lot of teen-lit and always compare herself with other people.

As we grew older, we develop a healthier relationship. We talked a lot about life, religion, politics, education, and the future. We talked about our parents and helped each other to adjust, as we realized that we have different norms at home and out there. He is still an annoying snob sometimes, but he can be sweet when I need him to. He's still childish most of the time, but he can act like my older brother when I need him to, perhaps because my parents always treat him like the oldest son in the family, instead of the second child. The moment when my dad was sick and needed a blood transfusion, I know right away that my infuriating little brother has turned into a dependable grown-up, and God only knows what I would do without him.

My brother was a classic middle child who was quite rebellious during his adolescence, but eventually he found his passion and figured out what he wants to be. At my graduation day, he told me that he didn't want to graduate in 3.5 years and with a cum laude just like his sister, as it sounds lame and geeky. But now? Now he is the geek in the family, as he spends hours to code every day, becomes the Assistant Lecturer, and works hard to maintain his GPA and graduate in less than 4 years whilst still being actively involved in several organizations. That's when I know that he is going to be someone in the future and I have nothing to worry about.

We're still not that sweet-siblings who tell I love you to each other, but since I'm away and I miss him (and my family) a lot, let me write this for once in my life. Thank you for being a significant part of my life. And thank you for saying this a few months ago,

"I have always thought that you'll end up with a man who is better than me, or at least as good as me."

It means a lot, even though I know how difficult it is to find a man who can meet that expectation.

So happy birthday and welcome to the early adulthood! May you always shine and be the man our parents taught to you be. And while I'm away, please take care of everyone and act like the oldest one in the family.