I'll be leaving in less than a week. My room is a complete mess now, with my clothes and luggage lying on the floor. My visa, passport, and other documents are ready. It's getting real.
I wish I could pretend that it's not a big deal, but it is. I enjoy being in solitude, but I have never been away from home and taken care of everything by myself. It's terrifying, yet exciting because I always wonder If I'm going to make it, living by myself. I'm even worrying about the long flight that I'm going to take in solitude. I don't know if I could spend more than 20 hours alone.
Most of my scholarship-friends are already abroad. Some even has started their courses. And a lot of them complained about their current situation: Missing home, sleepless nights due to some tasks, and lousy food. Nevertheless, most of them also showed their happiness to finally do things that they have been dreaming of for years: visiting world-class museums and football stadiums, getting freedom that they won't get in their home country, and learning things at the best universities.
Soon enough, those are going to be my day too. Both the good and the bad. I'm sure I'm going to feel the same excitement, as well as apprehension and sadness. I'm going to live in a city where no one knows me. I'm getting a fresh start, even tough it also means that I will have to work hard to start over.
Whatever that is, I'm sure that there is no problem that He's going to give me that I can't overcome. And no matter how bad my worst experience is there, it's going to be something that matters a lot in my life, perhaps something that's going to change my life or worldview.
I've been waiting for this for a year now, and now it's time to leave. I know it's not going to be easy, but everything that I have fought in the past was also not - yet I did it anyway. I'm just hoping that I won't be the stupidest in my class, given that I come from a country that doesn't have a great reputation for its education system and quality.
To new start, new journey, new lessons, new friends. To new experiences and new challenges. Wish me luck?